Haunted Playscape (LOW PRICE!)

If you believe in ghosts, this is perfect for you. If you don’t believe in ghosts, but have kids and you don’t care if they die in mysterious circumstances–this is perfect for you too:

Haunted Playscape (LOW PRICE!) - $120 (Austin)

Reply to: sale-803955954@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-19, 4:32PM CDT

Hi this was allegedly 2,399 dollars new, however I got it for a fraction of a cost from a previous owner. It seems the owner’s 2 children died of mysterious causes while on it.

Yesterday my son came in and said there was a kid with red eyes that said he wanted to eat his soul. This is not a joke, he knew nothing of the events that happened on the playscape.I peeked through my window and I saw a red light illuminating the playscape and I heard whispers telling me that we were next.

Other than that, it’s in near perfect condition. There is a little skuf mark on the slide, but some 409 would get that off easily. If you are an investigator of the paranormal, this would be perfect for you! If you don’t believe in ghosts, this would be perfect for your children! Write me back. : )

Price is LOW! LOW! LOW! I want this thing out of my life.

Forwarded by my boyfriend. Original source: Austin’s craiglist.

Geek Love

From Rants & Raves on Hartford’s Craigslist:

No, it’s not anything like Magic the Gathering you ass.

Reply to: XXXXX
Date: 2006-05-26, 8:23PM EDTWhat’s his comment when I tell him I have to read “Bad Twin” and “Our Mutual Friend”?? He starts giving me all this shit about how it’s just like Magic the Gathering, and that I shouldn’t give him shit anymore about his stash of Magic cards in a shoebox in our basement even though he’s 32 f’n years old and I cannot think of anything more lame ass than sitting around pretending to have magic powers and role playing some stupid dungeons and dragons crap.. No it is NOT THE SAME as the Lost Experience which ROCKS and is what TV should be- INTERACTIVE- and the finale was KICK ASS and I WILL read both books and watch all the eps. again for the easter eggs and go to HANSO.ORG a million times and IT ISN’T ANYTHING LIKE STUPID ASS MAGIC THE GATHERING YOU ASS.

* this is in or around my husband the ass

Blonde Ambition

Who says there weren’t any opportunities for career advancement out there for women? Courtesy of Hartford’s Craig’s List:

BLONDE NEWS ANCHOR
Reply to: XXXXX
Date: 2006-05-09, 11:06PM EDTElle Woods meets Tina Fey, that’s who we’re looking for…

…a dedicated and passionate individual to anchor a “blonde” newscast: news for those too busy to think! … Qualities:

-Credible as a blonde
-Articulate on everything from fashion to celebrity (you know, the important things)
-Non-regional accent preferred
-Cute as a button

If the requirements are too strenous or you don’t think you can pass as a “real” blonde, you can always try:

Party Girl Wanted
Reply to: XXXXX
Date: 2006-05-08, 7:08PM EDTMust have good computer, oral and like to drink.

To Dare to Dream

Recent gems from Hartford’s Craigslist:

● Free barbeque sauce and ketchup in New Britain!

They’re only offering a jumbo bottle of each though, so don’t get your hopes up for some mid-week body wrestling in an earth-toned condiment-filled, plastic kiddy pool with your boy, Blue. Although, it’s a start…and those pools don’t hold much.

Or is this some sort of swinger speak that we’re just not hip to?

● Someone in Manchester sets one of our favorite fantasy endings for the movie in motion by trying to kick Ferret Bueller out of the house permanently.

Our other blissful dream sequences involve him getting hit by a train, mucked up in a blender, beamed in the head by a baseball, suffocated under that parade float, and eaten by Principal Ed Rooney.

But our rage against smug suburban adolescence is not the ferret’s fault, so we wish him well. God speed, little guy.

The Book of Love

Superman and Spiderman may make more memorable first impressions, but bookish Clark Kent and nerdy Peter Parker always win their hearts. If you’re still hanging out in bars, trying to pick up chicks–the Scary Bunnies recommend that you don a pair of glasses (pick up something faux at Marshalls) and get over to the South Windsor Library where all the real love connections seem to be happening. Or just go there at the end of month and watch these two people trying to hook-up via Craig’s List.

South Windsor Library Monday Evening - w4m - 40
Reply to: XXXXXX
Date: 2006-02-08, 5:40PM EST

You were heading up the stairs in the library and I was heading down on Monday 2/6 at 6:30 p.m. You’re really tan and hot and we caught each other’s eye.

South Windsor Library Monday Evening - w4m
Reply to: XXXXXX
Date: 2006-02-11, 9:28PM EST

Yes, you were wearing a suit and tie. I was alone. I’ll be at the library on 2/27 around the same time.

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